Title: You’re Next
Starring:
A chick out of Home & Away
and Ti West, in the most poignant and plot dominating role you will ever see in a movie.
A family gathers in a remote country manor for a wedding anniversary.
A bunch of cute little animal mask wearing bandits intent on murder and mayhem, attack family.
After watching a few of these types of movies, one wonders if buying a remote country manor is a sensible decision if one wants to live a full healthy life away from psychotic maniacs.
However, after seeing the family dynamics of this group of people, one ceases to care.
Mother is stand-offish, yet skittish. Was clearly born with so many silver spoons so deep in her mouth, she clicks when she farts. She dies. (Spoiler alert)
Father is brow beaten, clinging desperately to the notion that he is the man of the house when Mother allows him to be. One of those stupid people who call out “Hello” when creeping through a quiet house looking for an intruder. He dies. (Spoiler alert)
One of the brothers is simply a dumb-ass. Deserves to die. Slowly. Does so. (Spoiler alert)
The Aussie chick from Home and Away has clearly watched Home Alone one too many times, and decides to fight back with boards, bricks, a meat tenderiser and various household implements, including my personal favourite, a blender.
The murder and mayhem the bandits were intent on, ensues.
They just weren’t counting on it ensuing on them.
Oh… and Ti West.
Mr West, playing the character of Tariq, carried the movie in my not so humble opinion.
Never before in the history of film, has someone with an arrow in their head managed to convey such raw emotion, such power, such heart wrench…. Oh wait… No… He dies. (Spoiler alert)
A seriously fun family movie.
The kiddies will laugh their asses off, I promise you.
Four gerbils.
You’re Next
